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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26630002">Mating Call</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/hobgoblin123/pseuds/hobgoblin123'>hobgoblin123</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Stargate Atlantis</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Clueless John, Culture Clash (kind of), First Kiss, M/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-09-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-09-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 07:28:09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,224</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26630002</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/hobgoblin123/pseuds/hobgoblin123</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Todd has found his perfect mate. John begs to disagree...</p>
<p>Try as I might, I can't add any notes. Hence, I have to post them here instead. Sorry!</p>
<p>Disclaimer: This is fanfiction, and no profit whatsoever is intended.</p>
<p>A/N1: Of course I know that the Knight Templars weren't merely accused of sodomy. It was more  of a standard accusation in heresy trials in those days.</p>
<p>A/N2: Sorry if I don't get the patterns of speech exactly right. As a non-native speaker, I've never watched an original episode, just the German translations. I simply don't know whether John says things like 'nope' and so on. Todd's more formal manner of speaking (no contractions and such) is deliberate.</p>
<p>A/N3: Considering my obsession with the Coldfire Trilogy and that there's also a Loki story in the making, I think it's safe to assume that I'm a sucker for the 'tall, dark (in the lethal sense) and snarky' type. Lol!</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>19</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Mating Call</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p>
<p>Staring out into the night, Colonel Sheppard sighed softly. Even in the best of times he was better at kicking ass than at dealing with emotional crap, and these days certainly weren't among them. To be honest, he'd been in a hell of a shitty mood for the last fortnight or so, and for once he couldn't blame his special friends from the IOA or one of their manifold Pegasus enemies for his grouchiness. Business on Atlantis was running unusually smoothly in fact. The Wraith seemed to be busy with killing each other off, the Genii were mercifully quiet, and no alien parasite or previously unknown virus was running rampage in the ancient city. So what the heck was wrong with him?</p>
<p>"Do you mind some company?" a voice John would have recognized among thousands cut through the still night air, making him wince. Damn! Of all the people currently populating Atlantis, this was the one he wanted to talk to least. "Nope," he replied with feigned nonchalance. "Where have you been all evening? Running tests again?"</p>
<p>"Not at all. Although I am loath to admit it, I needed some advice. On certain... biological matters, and thus Doctor Keller seemed the most fitting conversational partner."</p>
<p>Sheppard furrowed his brow. "Advice on biological matters? What's wrong? Are you sick? Do Wraiths become sick at all?"</p>
<p>"Aside from the side effects of the Hoffian Disease, you mean? Not really. Our immune system deals with bacteria or viruses before they can have an ill effect on our physiology." Todd rumbled out a deep chuckle. "Do not worry about my well-being, John Sheppard," he sniggered. "Nothing is wrong with me in medical respects. I am just preparing to take a mate."</p>
<p>John spat a mouthful of beer all over his sweatpants. "What the hell...?" he coughed when he had halfway regained the capacity for coherent speech. "That's a bad joke, right? Another taste of your godawful 'little bit of Wraith humour'."</p>
<p>Todd growled deep down in his throat, a sound so feral and threatening that it sent a cold shiver down Sheppard's spine. "This is no laughing matter. Should you do not deem me fit to be a proper mate, then let me tell you that I was consort of my queen and commander of her troops thousands of years before you were so much as a lusty twinkle in your father's eyes, as your underling Evan Lorne would put it. You had better remember that before questioning my abilities."</p>
<p>"I don't question your <em>abilities, </em><em>my ass</em>. But please correct me if I'm wrong in pointing out that there's no queen living in Atlantis. Holy shit, there isn't even another Wraith around, be it female or male. Thank God, if I may say so."</p>
<p>"You may. But you are wrong in one assumption, John Sheppard. I was not talking about mating with one of my kind. Not all humans are weak, born to be devoured."</p>
<p>Keller. A feeling of dread pooling in the pit of his stomach, John groaned inwardly. Todd's love interest, if it could be called that at all in connection with a bloody Wraith, just had to be her. She'd always gotten on comparatively well with him, had learned to see him as an individual and not just as a monster to be killed as soon as he wasn't useful anymore like almost everybody else on Atlantis. That certainly had won her quite a few brownie points with Mr Green.</p>
<p>Of course there was still the matter of Rodney McKay. Not an inch less arrogant and annoying as on the day he had joined their team, the man did have some redeeming traits, for example using his brilliant brains to save their collective asses on more occasions than Sheppard actually cared to count. On a purely intellectual level he and Todd might be almost equals, but it went without saying that poor Rodney couldn't hold a candle against the ancient Wraith commander in terms of physical attraction.</p>
<p>Realizing what had just crossed his mind, Sheppard blinked. Where the hell did <em>that</em> come from? Knowing full well that admitting to being bisexual would not only earn him a lot of silly jokes at his expense but actually very likely hinder his career in the Air Force, he had deemed it wise not to shout his sexual orientation from the rooftops. Elizabeth and Teyla might guess the truth, observant as they were, but he was pretty certain that the others were utterly oblivious to his dirty little secret. Or so he hoped.</p>
<p>But be that as it may, he couldn't possibly stoop so low as to feel sexually attracted to a life-sucking space vampire who'd survived the millennia by dining on hapless humans to his heart's content. Or could he?</p>
<p>Casting his nemesis an assessing look, John almost dropped his beer. Todd had swapped his usual attire for a pair of dark denims and matching tunic. Considering the soft shine of the material, the latter had to be silk, either imported from Earth or a Pegasus equivalent of the precious stuff. The ensemble was favourably completed by a calf-length, black velvet coat pimped up with roundabout a dozen silver buttons. Only God knew how Todd had gotten hold of such an eccentric piece in a place like Atlantis. Military personnel and eggheads alike usually weren't prone to wrapping themselves in garb that would have had the Vampire Lestat go green with envy. Not to mention than none of the crew save Ronon came even close to Todd's imposing height, and that the Saetedan would have rather shot himself than wearing such a thing - or lending so much as a measly nail to one of his sworn archenemies who'd annihilated his entire people, for that matter.</p>
<p>But whatever the damned coat's origin, there was no denying that the Wraith looked just splendid in it. It accentuated his roundabout 6 foot 4 in a very becoming fashion, swung around his deceptively lean frame like one of those dashing cloaks of old and... <em>Stop drooling, you stupid bastard</em>, John reprimanded himself. <em>This isn't Middle Earth. And if it were, dear Todd would presumably reside in Minas Morgul and torture halflings just for the fun of it. </em></p>
<p>“Although I could sense her discomfort, Doctor Keller did her best in teaching me about human sexuality and mating rituals," the Wraith's strange voice cut into his frantic mental ramblings. "But there is something I still do not understand. Maybe you can enlighten me."</p>
<p>There were about a few dozen things John would have preferred doing, being a prisoner of the Genii and getting bitten by an Iratus Bug again among them, but he saw no way of escaping without seriously affronting Todd, and that was something he wasn't altogether keen on. "Sure," he muttered. "But if we're about having a good ole man-to-man talk, why don't you have a beer with me?"</p>
<p>Todd accepted the can with a curt nod. When he took a deep draught, John grinned in spite of his misgivings. Who would have thought a year ago that he'd sit here with a Wraith of all people, peacefully getting sloshed together. "So what's bothering you, buddy?" he drawled when nothing else was forthcoming.</p>
<p>"The good doctor told me about discrimination against women. That it was quite common in the past and is still practised in certain cultures on Earth. Used to submit to a queen, I consider the whole concept quite disgusting, but that is not the point now." It seemed to John that Todd's cheeks turned a shade greener. "She also said that what you are wont to call homosexuality is not universally accepted on your mother planet, if not punishable by law outright. Is that true?”</p>
<p>“Well, you don't have to fear being burned at the stake for messing around with a bloke nowadays as it happened to the Knight Templars, so there's definitely been an improvement.”</p>
<p>Todd's brow clouded. “And who were these 'Knight Templars', pray tell? Rivals for power?”</p>
<p>“Nah, not really. Well, it's hard to explain without the cultural background and all that shit, but in the end they were warrior monks, protecting the... hey, Todd, are you all right? You don't look too good.”</p>
<p>“This is just a little bit of human humour, I suppose,” the Wraith ground out.</p>
<p>“Nope. Sorry. But as I've been trying to say, stuff like that happened a long time ago. No need to fly off the handle now.”</p>
<p>His eyes blazing and teeth bared in a snarl, Todd was a frightening sight to behold. “Have you lost your mind?” he hissed. “To meet out punishment for something completely natural is bad enough, but to defame a bond between warrior brothers – if you stand for such an atrocious crime, you are not the man I have taken you for.”</p>
<p>John raised both hands in a placating gesture. “Never said I did. But now you've my curiosity piqued. What about the Wraith, Todd? With regard to your reaction to the crap I told you, your kind seems to have a completely different view on these matters.”</p>
<p>“I guess you could say that.” Todd huffed. “You need to know that female wraiths are very rare, I do not know why. Those who survive the struggle for power become queens. Although she could technically demand sexual services from each hive member, a queen only has one consort at a time. This leaves hundreds of male Wraith per hive without a partner of the opposite sex. Save those few who choose to find pleasure in the arms of a worshipper, that is.</p>
<p>“And so the frustrated unlucky devils...” Leaving the rest unsaid, John settled for wiggling his eyebrows.</p>
<p>“Precisely. It poses no problem, as long as it does not interfere with their duties to the queen. Some only mate once, to release sexual tension. Others stay together for a long time, sometimes even until one of them dies. It is not uncommon that the surviving partner of such a long-time union seeks death in battle thereafter. That almost always happens if they were warrior brothers, fighting side by side. It is the closest, most revered bond we know of.”</p>
<p>“Warrior brothers, eh? I wonder whether... oh well, never mind.”</p>
<p>"But I do mind, John Sheppard. I mind very much."</p>
<p>Before John could ask what the hell was that supposed to mean, a strange noise assaulted his ears, followed by an eruption of laughter that seemed to come from the mass a dozen floors below. For a moment he couldn't make sense of the sound strangely akin to a human heartbeat, but then he remembered the <em>Bodhran</em> Private O'Hara had smuggled in after his last leave.</p>
<p>He'd taken the mickey out of the man for pounding away on that silly thing more than once, but if he was honest to himself, the rhythmical throbbing had something atavistic about it, stirred certain crazy notions he couldn't afford to have. Not now, not ever.</p>
<p>To divert his attention, he cast a sidewards glance at his ally against all odds, something he immediately regretted. Todd was watching him intently without so much as a single blink, his snake eyes wide and and eerily bright in the light of the myriad of stars glittering high above them. It was unsettling, to say the least, but not half as shocking as his own reaction to the challenging stare.</p>
<p>The night seemed to hold her breath all at once. There was no natural enmity anymore, no service regulations and compunctions, just the rousing call of the ancient Celtic instrument bringing his blood to a boil, the foreign stars circling slowly above them and those utterly otherworldly eyes burning straight into his soul, stripping it bare.</p>
<p>A sudden gust of wind blew around the tower, whipping strands of Todd's long, white hair across Sheppard's face. The faint scent of Keller's trademark apple shampoo was very agreeable if unexpected, the sensation coming with it no less pleasant.</p>
<p>John narrowed his eyes. Evidently Todd's clothing wasn't the only thing that had changed that night. Whatever the Wraith had done had transformed his usual shaggy locks into something altogether different. Almost silver in the moonlight, the veritable mane of spun silk framing his face softened his angular features into something almost human, even desirable.</p>
<p>Sheppard felt like banging his head against the wall. As an alternative, he could of course get hammered or jump off the tower and end his misery for good. Even a combination of all three was possible. It would be death by Wraith alright, if in a completely different sense of the term.</p>
<p>A glimmer of amusement in his eyes, Todd snorted. Then he suddenly stepped aside and started to pivot in one single motion so fluent and effortless that it made John's hairs stand on end all over his body. Again and again he turned, never missing a beat and evidently not giving a shit about the abyss gaping not far from his swift feet.</p>
<p>His eyes glued on the creature swirling around as gracefully as a human ballet dancer, Sheppard's brain almost imploded at the sight. He'd seen many a strange thing during his years in the Pegasus Galaxy, wondrous and bizarre and outright terrible things, but this he hadn't expected to encounter. The Wraith were monsters, nightmarish enemies that had to be killed whenever possible. At least that was the official point of view, shared by most members of the expedition. But if Todd had told the truth and they loved, mourned and despaired of life just like any other sentient being, what else might be hidden beneath the fiendish facade?</p>
<p>He hadn't quite finished this thought when the Wraith somehow lost his balance and almost went over the railing. Running purely on instinct, Sheppard darted forward and caught him in his arms. Todd wasn't even out of breath. “As I have told you once before, there is much you do not know about Wraith,” he said calmly, making no move to disentangle himself. “But if you are interested in broadening your horizon, I am willing to be your teacher.”</p>
<p>That exotic face staring expectantly down on him was much too close for John's peace of mind. It had taken him a ridiculous amount of time, but by now, with an armful of Wraith pressed flush against him, he was pretty sure that Keller wasn't the chosen one. Crap! “I don't think that's a good idea. Why don't we just call it a day and hit the sack?” he blurted out, wishing himself to the other end of the galaxy.</p>
<p>Todd frowned. “But it is night, and I have no wish to hit something. Not yet, anyway. But being able to scent human sex pheromones, I cannot help but wondering why you would want to reject my proposal.”</p>
<p>“Yeah, well, you got me there. But we can't do this. It's not right.”</p>
<p>The creases in Todd's forehead deepened. “You do not make any sense, John Sheppard. I followed every single one of Doctor Keller's instructions concerning human mating rituals, although I deemed it prudent not to undress in public while dancing for you in spite of Dr McKay's doubtlessly well-meant suggestions. I even offered you the opportunity to rescue me, something I was told human men find very attractive. So which part of my courtship do you find unacceptable?”</p>
<p>“Nothing, per se. I... hold on, Todd! What did you just say? Rodney fucking McKay told you to... to...”</p>
<p>“To remove my garments one at a time, to musical accompaniment. He called it strip-tease.”</p>
<p>John let off steam with a string of expletives worthy of a seasoned soldier. “How dare he!” he barked, his temper close to boiling point. “But that's not the end of the story. Just wait until I get my fingers around your chubby neck, you scheming, manipulative bastard! Son of a bitch! To backstab a friend like that...”</p>
<p>“I gather that Dr McKay's advice was not to your liking. But maybe we can postpone debating a fitting punishment for his insolence until tomorrow.” Todd harrumphed. “What I would like to know is whether you are just taking offence at his meddling with your personal affairs or find the thought of my naked body repulsive, regardless of the circumstances. In the latter case we will not speak about this ever again.”</p>
<p>This was the exit John had been looking for. Just say 'yuck', make a dash for the door, and the problem was history. The Wraith sure as hell would get over it. It was a pity that he found the idea of hurting Todd a lot less appealing than seeing him in the nude.</p>
<p>A beautiful contralto suddenly chimed in with O'Hara's blasted Bodhran. Half-listening to a tale of love found and lost in times of war, John noticed that his arms were still around Todd's waist as if they belonged there. The Wraith seemed to come to the same conclusion. His lips curling into a smile, he pulled his human closer, straight into a kiss. <em>Warrior brother mine</em>, it whispered at the back of Sheppard's mind. Then the kiss deepened, and he stopped thinking altogether.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>None of them heard the door behind them clicking shut very, very softly. “Yesss!” Rodney whispered, pumping his fist in the air. “You owe me twenty bucks.”</p>
<p>Keller chuckled. “But Todd didn't strip. That's fifty for me. Would have been interesting to watch, though.”</p>
<p>“Yeech! Was that necessary? There isn't enough brain bleach in the entire Pegasus Galaxy to get that picture out of my head.”</p>
<p>“Stop whining, Rodney. It was you who suggested it in the first place. If I were you, I'd rather worry about the 'fitting punishment' Todd was talking about.”</p>
<p>McKay blanched. “You... that's a joke, right? RIGHT? Oh God, I don't want to end up as a mummy! Bandages don't suit me. And what will Jeanie say? Help!”</p>
<p>“Shush!!! It <em>was</em> a joke, for Heaven's sake, but we'll get caught if you don't stop screaming bloody murder. I've better plans for the night than explaining our presence to an enraged Wraith.”</p>
<p>“Your plans...” The colour returning to his face, McKay gave her his best puppy dog eyes. “Do they involve me?”</p>
<p>“They might. And now let's go. John and Todd should be okay, at least as long as they make ample use of the lube I prescribed. ”</p>
<p>“You did what?!?”</p>
<p>“I'm their treating physician and responsible for their well-being. As our Wraith in residence left no doubt about his intentions and I know his anatomy...” Jennifer shrugged.</p>
<p>“Care to share some details? Just for scientific purposes, of course.”</p>
<p>“Medical confidentiality, Rodney.”</p>
<p>“Aw, come on, Jen, that's mean.”</p>
<p>“'That's none of your business' is more like it. But to keep you from pestering me all night: The condoms I added to the package are among the biggest available on the market. Does that answer your question?”</p>
<p>“Wow.” McKay sounded pretty impressed.</p>
<p>“Mmh. But size isn't everything, or so they say.” Jennifer flashed him a devious smile. “I think it's time to put that old saying to a test. Just for scientific purposes, of course.”</p>
<p>Muttering something about green-blooded space hobgoblins and their bad influence on female medical personnel under his breath, McKay followed her down the spiral staircase and back to the living quarters.</p>
<p> </p>
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